I must be the most lucky guy in the world, if not the most annoyed. I have come across such a speldor of a race on the web, I come across them every so often, I come across them ALL OF THE TIME. You know these people, they are gods, in thier own mind. I had to write about these idiots, to get them off of my chest.

Thier god complexs drive me nuts. It shouldnt, as this is just the web, and they are just text to me, but it irks me something terribl to know there are these people out there, and even more people who are dumb enough to believe them. There are different types of the gods I've encounted a few earlier that I'll mention.

(I'm not saying everyone is a liar, but you can spot these people as they will talk about thier subject and nothing else. Of course each god can be a mixture of two or more, which is often the case)

We have the Technology God

The Money God

The Clever God

The Bashing/Supreme Intelligence god

The Mirror God

- The technology God - . .. .You know these people, they have the best computer that has ever existed, and can't help themselves but to spam thier fictional computers credentials every chance they get. "WHAT!? You mean youre not running over 1000 mb of RAM, wow how can you survive? I need over 1000 mb of RAM to run my 4 dozen moniter system, my 4 DVD burners, my 8,000 versions of Windows running at once, a special adapter so I can turn my PC into a MAC with the click of my golden mouse. I also have a beta (secret) version of the unreleased Pentium 80 processor, which gives me enough power to start my car from my computer" When they are not on thier computer, they are usually watching thier HDTV Plasma TV, which also connects to the web BTW. They have 5 of these, at $20,000 a pop, with 16 Tivos hooked up to each one through a self created network that hooks into thier super computer. You cant even mention a TV show to these people w/out an in depth anylisis of how they plan to record the show without lifting a finger. They know every solution to every computer problem, and will claim to have worked on huge projects, and been thier hero of those projects, but will never explain what they did. Whats worse, stupid, stupid people buy into this, and believe them.

- The Money God - . .. .These people have more money then Scrooge Mcduck, and have mutiple money bins like him too. They usually spend 15 hours aday online, which suggests to me they are unemployed,  but somehow they have more money to burn them most will ever see. They hav alot in commen with the Technology God, as they electronics are superb to anyone elses. They may have a corvette one day, but if another Money God has a corvette, then the original money god's corvette turns into an Aston Martin. These people like to complain alot. Somehing is going wrong with thier finacial situation, and thier income will be cut by 6 figures. But they will still continue to have more money then anyone else. They will often brag about trips they took to Paris last week, when they were online everyday that week. Basically every subject they speak in, they bring up thier money, and a point to mention they have just bought any new and expensive item that just came out, be it 500$ for 5 seasons of TV DVDs or a new 200$ game system because someone put a scrath in thier old one. Most of the time thier expensive things are sitting collecting dust as they only bought them to try them out. Whats worse, stupid, stupid people buy into this, and believe them.

- The Clever God - . .. .These are the people who can never be outwitted, and are NEVER wrong. They will often lure someone else into being rude or flaming them, then cry that they were insulted.

Person: "Man this isnt cool"

God: " What do you mean this isnt cool, if your little feelings dont like it then get out"

Person: "HEY! I did nothing to you damnit, dont talk to me like that"

God: "Aww you cussed and were quite rude to me, please wait here while I report you to a moderator"

Another example of these gods can be traced to a sub god, The Passive-Instigator Gods. The best example of this is one who goes by the name of BDCD- Brandon Delrow. These god join message board and play the part of of the most caring passive person alive, yet they are extremely judgmental, and will attempt to cast anyone to hell who does not share thier views. They will run around posting non threating things like: "Heh Heh, thats silly, when I get really really. .. . not happy, but not quite mad, as I never get mad, I eat cheetos and use silly hearts in my posts despite the fact i'm supposed to be a man."

Then secrety they will IM thier target flaming them with curses, wait for you to react, and act like a 5 year old baby, asking others how could a sweet person such as them be the target of such a bad guy? What worse, some stupid, stupid people buy into it, and believe them.

- The Bashing/Supreme Intelligence God- . .. .These are the people who hate everything, and the reason they hate it is because it dosent hold up to thier standards. They could do SOOO much better, however they choose to spend thier time online bitching about whatever it is they dont like, be it a TV show, sports, ect.

God: "Man oh man, that movie was terrible. That actor needs to have his acting freedom revoked and sent to a school of retarded actors. The plot was soo weak, and the director must have slept through the filming. I knew the end before it was gonna happen. Hell, they should let me write for them, as everything I see I can tear apeart, point out all of the flaws, as I'm that good"

These people will go on, and on, and on. you'll see them everyday complaining about something, but the ironic this is, if they hate something that much, then why do they waste thier time obsessing over it and bashing it online? I think of these people as swamp scum, who have empty lives, probably not too bright upstairs, and they do this to try and create an image of themselves online, they try to be online who they wish they were in real life. In life, these morons are probably shy, unspoken little nobodies. If you happen to like the show or movie they are bashing, then you are ignorent, and dont know anything about anything. Whats worse, people actually buy into this, and believe them.

- The Mirror God-. .. .These people are probably the most delusional. While the other gods are putting on an act to make thier little selves feel better, these people actually believe the propoganda they speak about themselves. These are the people who can do anything better, write better, design better, spell better, handle situations better, ect. Not only will they force thier views on you, but insult you if you do not share them. Just tonight on the Star Trek message boards I came across one. He was debating the demise of Enterprise, but had to post over 6,000 words, where at least 5,200 of them werent even Trek related. He mentioned how he has worked with the last 3 presidents, a handful of senators, had contacts within Paramount, was good friends with many of the cast members, ect. ect. Who ever didnt agree with him were called 'kids who dont know better'. I can not do these types of people justice, it's something you have to see for yourself. Like many of the other gods, these people always know better, and ARE better. Whats worse, people buy into this and believe them.

I feel better now, I go to many places on the web, and alot of those places has regulars, in total they fall into one of these God Complex Groups, and some fall into others that I havent mentioned. I'll admit, these people have one over on me, as everytime I see them I want to pull my hair out of my head, or post to them what I REALLY think, but bite my tounge.

For the record, none of these people are part of The Last Outpost, or The Captain's Table

Untill Next Time. .. .

~Myke